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Need more opinions. Is there anything wrong with this poem? If there is anything wrong, point it out please!!!!





This song is emotional, but not that blue,
I gave you my heart, now you have two.
I gave you my love, as did you,
It warms my heart, to know you love me too.

One day, under the full moon,
I wish to take your heart away, like a thieving goon,
Through your gleaming eyes, gleaming crystal eyes,
You will see a diamond crystal, in a golden tie.

All I want from you, all I wish
Is for you to say, " I love you too "

Respuesta :

AstudentzHcps

Answer:

It's good

Explanation:

It's good however, do you need to add the same line on "Gleaming eyes, gleaming crystal eyes"?

arob8358

Answer: In my opinion your stanzas are a little bigger than what they should be. in the first stanza as should be so an in stanza 3 the Line 4 should be Through your gleaming Crystal eyes,because it just sounds like your repeating yourself. stanza 3 Line 5 you should probably say you will shine like a golden tie,the org. sentence doesn't sound right . Overall Iove the poem.

Explanation:

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